I have done this, and the only thing I regretted is not eating more olives.
I run out of olives, then tell myself not to do it, but still sneak a sip of juice from the jar.
“You’re disgusting.”
“DON’T YOU JUDGE ME, ME!”
Fun fact - a sip or two of pickle juice is a great cure for heartburn. I don’t even like pickles, but I’ll do it because it works.
I can’t stand olives, even more than I dislike pickles, so idk if olive juice would do the same, but it is, at least, not grosser from an objective view 😅
Drinking pickle juice is a dangerous game. Misjudge your jar tilt and one of those slippery bois will just shoot down your gullet and shuffle you off this mortal coil in the blink of a cucumber.
I’ve heard apple cider vinegar shots being helpful for the same reason
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Would that just be cucumber oil?
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Had this for dinner last night. Paired it with some tortilla chips to help round out its nutritional value. Might do it again tonight. It’s called The Mediterranean Diet.
It tastes like the Mediterranean too!
My typical dinner tastes like the Aral.
Me eating an entire can of chickpeas with a spoon
XD I did this once and it was surprisingly delicious. I was tired and hungry, opened the can to cook it with other prepared ingredients. Decided to spoon some in my mouth, and then another, and then another, until I ate all of it right there.
Where’s the protein…
At the store, busy being expensive
Beans are cheap and if you just want nutritional value they hit both carbs and protein in a great amount per ounce. Of course there’s the studies showing regional genes benefit more from specific macro sources over others (IE an Asian would utilize rice glycogen better than oats), but if you want to hit the basics: beans
That’s good advice, but tbf when I’ve done something like this, it’s not because I’ve had a little money and decided to go for olives and chips
Tortilla chips have nearly 0 nutritional value tho…
Yes but typically they come with a ton of sodium, as do olives. Won’t anyone think of the sodium? Blood pressure be damned!
I am Italian and I approve this message
I don’t see how this is a shitpost, it’s just unironically a great thing to do.
How much did big olive pay you to say this
I’d love to eat big olive
Yeah, they’re delicious, nutritious, and never go bad. Perfect for the man who does not like grocery shopping.
Are the haters imagining people eating the super-salty pimiento olives? I’m talking about the fancy olives that I, as a sophisticated and wealthy bachelor, buy per-pound from the grocery-store salad bar.
Wait never go bad?
Not never, but the ones in sealed jars or cans can last years. Opened jars/cans and deli-counter olives can last months if refrigerated.
There’s a limit to not exceed though (for me at least :-D )
41 olives.
OH MY FUCKING GOD I LOVE OLIVES JUST SHOVE THEM INTO MY MOUTH OM NOM NOM OH GOD THEY’RE DELICIOUS SO TASTY MMMMMMM GOOD OLIVES NICE OLIVES CHOP THEM UP AND PUT THEM ON PIZZA AND IF YOU DON’T LIKE OLIVES THEN FUCK YOU OLIVES ARE DELICIOUS YOU CAN FUCK OFF BACK TO BIG LINGUINI TRYING TO RUIN THE NAME OF DELICIOUS OLIVES THEY ARE MY LIGHT AND JOY OLIVES ARE SO GOOD I CANNOT HELP MYSELF I WILL EAT ONE OR TWO OR A THOUSAND I AM BECOME OLIVE
i’m starting to think that you might like olives
New Answer just dropped
I’m not falling for this. I think I’ve read a greentext about doing this and the anon ended up covered in shit sobbing himself to sleep on the bathroom floor
People get sick from eating olives? Man I can eat a jar of green olives, pair it with a brick of cheddar cheese and you’ve got yourself a meal.
Yeah wtf? I’ll eat a whole jar of kalamata and have no problems.
Maybe your stomachs still work properly. The other day I had a slice of cake and I swear I had to rush to the toilet before I had even finished it. I cannot understand how that’s physically possible.
I’ve found my people. Think I’ll go indulge in a brick of cheddar right now. The concrete that I have to pass tomorrow will be … well … tomorrow’s problem.
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Olives are toxic until they’ve been brined. Those sort of discoveries always make me wonder… who figured out that immersing them in salt water for a month would make them edible without making you sick?
That was a jar of pickles and it caused him great gastrointestinal issues that resulted in acid like bowel movement.
This reaction isn’t normal though.
Even just eating like 5 olives makes things extra smooth down the line >.>
…i just ate eight flavor grenade pluots for dinner about two hours ago, crunchy, green, and tart: the flavor part was absolutely true but as i’m sitting down to type this i suddenly realise that the grenade part was, too…
If you have the occasion, try a fresh olive picked from the three. You won’t regret it ;)
Why not eat the other too?
This won reply is my favorite.
This is my life motto now, thanks.
As a Greek with olives in their family house, I can highly ^^^not recommend this
Lmao why not?
Olive’s someone’s daughter, sister, mom, cousin, aunt…
Bitter as hell.
The olives need to be cured before they are edible.
Why not 2 or 4?
How many olives should you eat?
Olive them.
Officer, I want to report this DAD.
About 3 months ago I suddenly developed an indefatigable craving for olives. Since then I’ve eaten about a small jar a week. IDK if I’m pregnant (seems unlikely) or if olives are just a normal part of adulthood, similar to how everyone in college eats a lot of toast on occasion.
tempted to post the classic 4chan pickle story
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beautiful every time
Adult people drown them in martinis. So, Jar a week souds about right. :)
Marinate them in a bit of vodka for a relaxing evening repast
Literally my kids everyday. They fucking LOVE olives. It’s weird. We don’t encourage it and we tell ourselves it’s a phase that will eventually wear off.
It won’t. I’m in my late 30s and olives are still the fucking best thing ever.
My mother tells me my uncle would eat nothing but olives for about a year when he was a toddler. He threw a massive fit if they tried to feed him anything else.
I’m 23 now and olives are still hard drugs to me, once I get started I want to eat the entire stash
In time, it will get sane. I used to drink pickle juice.
Still love pickles, but I don’t drink the brine.
I could eat an entire jar of green olives and drink the juice. Actually I still do. Olives are good.
The ones stuffed with blue cheese are my favorites.
What the fuck where do I find said magical item?
If they’re not with the regular olives, maybe they’re in the deli section of the grocery store
white cheese for me
Autocorrect decided to change “bleu” to “blue”.
Last night I ran out of pickle juice before i ran out of pickles
Are you kids Greek? 😂
Fun fact: olives are technically fruit.
More fun facts: tomatoes and pineapples are berries.
Well, pineapple is a bunch of berries fused together.
Unrelated : avocado is a berry.
Subscribed to fruit and berry facts
This just in: Banana has officially sided with the berries!
pistachios are a drupe (like a charry) not a nut
This means olive oil is fruit juice.
olive juice is fruit juice. olive oil comes from crushing the fruit’s nuts
Yeah, ate a (large) bunch of green olives in quick succession once. Turned my stomach into Vesuvius during Pompeï’s final moments.
Sometimes when I’m backed up having a way to clear the pipes is nice. There are few things I enjoy more than a blast from the ass.
c/nocontext
I agree, but unfortunately this time it forced its way back up at night (because of the acidity).
Edit: It’s
I mean, I’ll happily eat 10 olives as part of a salad, or 20 straight-up as a snack. You’ve gotta rinse them off first, though. Also, the cheap brands are less oily and salty.
Rinse them? I spear them right out of the jar. I love 'em. I’ll try rinsing one today to see what that’s like, but I suspect the oil and salt is a big part of why I like them.
Here’s something else to try.
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Rinse out the olives and put them in a clean jar.
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Add a somewhat generous amount of olive oil. Best you can find.
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Add salt, dried chili flakes, and oregano.
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Squeeze like half a lemon in the jar. Cut a few thin slices off the other half, cut them in quarters and drop them in as well.
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Vigorously shake the jar so all the olives are coated nicely in the spicy lemony oil.
I always have a jar of this in my fridge. God tier stuff, once you’ve got the mix right in steps 3 and 4.
How long does it last, a couple of days?
Likely a little longer due to the acid.
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I came across The Sad Bastard Cookbook on HN. It is amazing and very much in the spirit of this post.
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