Who does this? The condiments would be gone half way through this way. You gotta get them down the sides.
I use mustard on the bun first, like glue for the weiner. (2nd grade level giggle) Then i pile on the onions, relish, or whatever on top
So the first half is all the good stuff, and the second half is just mustard?
Wait. Are you eating hot dogs parallel to the dog or perpendicular?
I’m not sure what your frame of reference is, but I eat them top down like everyone else. Do you… not?
The appeal of the hotdog is the convenient mouth-sized cross section.
What? Whose mouth is that big?
Ice Bear apparently
Fair point.
Polar Bear has the right idea.
Only small children and the Dutch use anything besides mustard on a hot dog you heathen.
no, that’s mayonaise on fries
Puritanical nonsense, and categorically untrue. The Chicago dog, Sonoran dog and chili dog are all firmly cemented in their respective regions, and those are just the first three I could think of.
There’s only one condiment that’s not allowed near my wien, and that’s ketchup. There exists a whole universe of acceptable hot dog condiments otherwise. I’ll prepare an extra “fully loaded” hot dog in your name tonight, and you better believe I’m going to savage that wiener, and all its saucy, crunchy and tangy accoutrements, with fervent gusto.
Are you a small child or Dutch?
No.
[citation needed]
Reminds me of being a kid and making a wotsit (you might need to be from the UK to know what those crisps are) sandwich with cheese spread… and the cheese spread was there to stop the wotsits falling out.
Onions and mustard? You must be an antifa terrorist!
I slather the crease in relish, then tuck diced tomatoes/onion/lettuce (eg) into the relish, then dog, then presentation mustard.
relish from the grocery store has gotten so cheaply made you have to strain it first. even, and especially, the mass market ‘name brands’. i did run across one super off-brand, imported from turkey or india or something, that was great, though… and like half the store brand price.
so unless i have that or strain the ‘regular’ stuff first, or just cut-up some pickles instead (what i’ve been doing more of lately), the relish goes on top. everything else goes on first.
The Heinz relish aint so bad… i use it and its ok. I miss the Coney Island deli we used to have here 20 years ago… its become a laundry now.
I know, its so hard not to rub the weiners together before I sit down at the table 2 feet from my kitchen. The insatiable need to rub two sloppy condimented weiners against each other in such a way that the condiments on top are completely removed is just overwhelming. I can barely sit at the table before I give in to rubbing to sloppy condimented weiners together in such a way that all the condiments on the top come off.
You surely won’t regret rubbing sloppy condiment weiners together.
Mmm, no. Thank you.
Looks like it will feed a horde of pigeons after my desperate attempt to eat this hotdog without dropping anything on the ground.
This is correct.
Is that a salad?
I actually prefer putting the stuff on the bun under the hotdog.
ITT: I cannot believe the debate over hot dog size, bun size, and condiment application, lol.
I CAN’T BELIEVE IT’S NOT BRATWURST
And what’s the deal with hot dogs coming in packs of 6, and buns in 8? Atleast if it was the other way around, we could shove’em up our asses and call it a day. Laugh track, followed by stupid Seinfeld jingle
Shitpost aside, my dad did honey mustard under the dog while topping it with chili and cheese. It’s the only way to do that combo right.
Never used honey mustard, but classic yellow mustard in a chili cheese dog is always great.
Try that but with proper mustard https://tracklementsglobal.com/us/product/strong-english-mustard/
Recent French’s convert. I love me some stone ground!
Try anything from Edmond Fallot
This tarragon mustard is a favorite of mine
OP is the type of guy who takes a shit and stands up to wipe his ass.
I actually do this now because wiping my ass on the toilet gave me a herniated disc. The standing up is way more forgiving to the spine.
OP thinks his farts don’t smell if he can’t smell them.
We are the 25%
Sometimes my back hurts to twist. So it’s either that with the football hike, or shower. And work doesn’t have a shower.
Sir this is not a Wendy’s
How dare they want to do a good job wiping
Thanks a bunch OP. Now I have a new peeve.
You put it on top so that the flavor of the condiments doesn’t overpower each bite.
If you put it on top, condiments is all you’d taste for the first few bites, then it would just be a plain dog the rest of the way. Why would anyone do that?
How are you getting plain dog after first few bites? I’m picturing you eating a hot dog like corn on the cob
Top down, like everyone else. How do you eat them?
You deep throat that thing like God intended.
Then unless you’re looking for lube, between the bun and dog is superior. Other than sauerkraut, I put so much on that it’s would just turn into an open face sandwich, which tbf it still kinda is.
Those aren’t mutually exclusive
WHY DONT YOU POST AN ALTERNATIVE??? HUH??
Was that too aggressive?
I EAT THEM LIKE THIS
Believe it or not, straight to jail.
Yessss thank you
HAPPY TO HELP
Jail, just, somebody…you have to pay for this!
People with big mouths (like me, I have a big mouth) eat hotdogs in bites that span left to right, and top to bottom along (approximately) a plane that lies perpendicular to the axis along which the hotdog was extruded. With this approach, the condiments merely have to run the length of the hotdog (or just the bun if you dislike messy eating) in order for them to participate in every bite.
Only small mouth dweebs that can’t fit a wide, juicy frank into their mouth when they’re gobbling down a… Nevermind, I think I got sidetracked.
No dawg, you gotta flip it turn-ways.
this dude eating hotdogs like corn on the cob?
Op used ragebait. It was highly effective.
Absolutely cursed image. I’m dying.
What is wrong with you?
Can’t say for sure, I don’t have an official diagnosis so far.
Mustard belongs in the trash. Hotdogs belong with jesus.
Are you suggesting Jesus belongs in the trash?
Are you trying to put Jesus in my mouth?
Open your
heartmouth and let Jesus come inside you. 😌
Replace that boring mustard with spicy brown and that’s exactly how I do a dog.
Under? So the first half is just plain dog?
Under. So the mustard is less likely to glop onto your shirt
Are you eating your dogs sideways? Every bite has mustard on it.
I’m eating them top down like everyone else. So if you don’t get condiments along the side of the dog, they’re gone after the first few bites.
You’re supposed to eat them from the bottom up. That’s how monkeys do it in the wild, so obviously it’s how we evolved to eat hotdogs.
Sometimes aesthetics trump evolution
